Tuesday, June 10, 2014

The Average Day in a Bride's Mind

Maybe you've noticed my sheer lack of blogging lately. Let me tell you why in two simple words: wedding planning. I never realized just how all-consuming planning my wedding day would be. Here's how my life has been the last month or so:

  • Wake up from nightmares about the wedding. "OMG! Why is she wearing white at my wedding!???
  • Relay nightmares to fiancĂ©, who shrugs and states mildly, "Why do you worry so much? I'm just excited to be marrying you!"
  • Go to work and attempt to focus on writing about wheat varieties. Get distracted about massive Wedding To Do list and adding to it so nothing important is forgotten. "Buy socks. Having the right socks for my boots is of dire importance."
  • Take a lunch break. Talk about all of the Wedding To Do list with fiancĂ©. "No! You can't eat right now! We must determine who is going to pick up your suit three months from now! Right now!"
  • Go back to work, still attempting to write about wheat varieties. "This Hard Red Winter wheat is very drought tolerant.... What if it rains on my wedding day!?" Furiously google average weather for White Deer, Texas on August 30. Chances of rain are not likely. Determine back-up rain plan anyway.
  • Leave work early. The florist closes at 5 p.m., and this is not a discussion for over the phone. Must be face-to-face. Florist: "You can just give me a call if that would be easier." Me: "It would be easier, but heck no! I must come see you!"
  • Florist appointment is over in 10 minutes. Still don't know how much flowers are going to cost. "This wedding will in fact break me financially, but I need those roses!"
  • Remember the Wedding To Do list - with the Need to Buy list - is still sitting on the desk. Fail to buy anything on the list while in town. "I can't buy anything without my list. I must be able to cross it off the list as I get it."
  • Drive home, empty-handed. Think about all of the DIY projects you need to work on when you get home. "Paint that cardboard letter; hot glue that string on those bottles; remove the labels on said bottles; drink the alcoholic beverages in said bottles... Wait? What? I can't do that! I must be in tip-top form to paint and glue!"
  • Eat supper with delicious potato salad. Second guess plan of having baked potatoes at wedding reception. "But this potato salad is divine! The guests would love it. Or would they?"  
  • Call Mom to talk about the wedding. Get drilled with questions you don't know the answer to. "What dishes will the head table use? What song will you dance with your dad to? Who all is coming? How will you keep people cool? What are you feeding people?"
  • Cry. 
  • Cry harder.
  • Sob uncontrollably.
  • Add all the answers to Mom's questions to the Wedding To Do list. "Must get wheat dishes for the head table. Determine song for Father-Daughter Dance. Order fans - lots of them. Determine final menu."
  • Attempt to sleep. Go through Wedding To Do list mentally, which causes anxiety and inability to sleep. Begin counting sheep, which soon morph into dancing wedding dresses. "One beautiful ball gown. Two sexy mermaids. Three fitted trumpets. Four flowy A-lines. Five zzzzzzzz."
  • Nightmare about another woman wearing white to my wedding reoccurs. "Her!? Again!? That strumpet!!!!"
  • Repeat process.
*Please note: Above process is exaggerated significantly. Wedding planning is sometimes rewarding, and I cannot wait for the big day!

**Also note: Notice the lack of anxiety about who I am marrying. I am 100 percent positive in my choice of husband, just not so certain in my choices of the wedding itself.

***Note to Mom: I love your input! I really do, but it just felt necessary to include.

****Final note: I promise I do actually work during the day. Although it can be challenging to stay focused with so much wedding happenings happening.